This virulence has issued forth
Without regard to the wounds it has gouged
In the depths of your beautiful soul;
For this slander—
Blaspheming your sacred name
And shackling your mind to even more remorse—
I should never be allowed
To grace your presence again.
Never was it my intention
To afflict you with guilt,
But it’s so much easier
To wallow in this selfish pity
Than to face the truth:
Love is a much harder emotion to swallow
Than this despotic rage I have driven myself to
In my effort to cope,
Because I don’t know how to process
The blessings you’ve drowned me in.
The truth is you’re a light in my darkness,
Revealing beauty where I assumed there was none,
And everything you are—
Is nothing short of mesmerizing.
Though I may howl my displeasures
Into the ether of abstraction,
In truth my suffering is my own fault—
No one else’s—
And were my life worth giving at all,
I’d offer every remaining second to you,
And would never once look back.