If I had to describe the sensation
Of stepping into your iridescent presence,
Knowing I can only get so close—
Never close enough to bask in your light—
It would be the panic of suffocation,
The constriction in the chest
That paralyzes all rational thought
And ignites a frenzy of apprehension,
Except I can still breathe;
And no matter how long I struggle,
I cannot escape the pain,
The sensation of life fading,
The realization that death is creeping into my soul.
Everything turns grey;
Nothing amuses or mollifies.
All ambition that once burned
Has now been doused, smothered;
Sometimes it makes me scream out
Or pace back and forth
Within the confines of these sallow walls,
But most of the time I just sit and stare:
Vapid, nothing more than a shell,
As if I am dead already,
Because once you stepped into my world,
Vivacious and ethereal in every breath,
I realized in your absence, there is only death.


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