Ladies and gentlemen:

This is me at my weakest—
My most vulnerable and exposed—
Laying bare my most fatal flaw
To grow stronger than ever before.

The darkness has conquered,
Vanquished hope in its veracious path,
Leaving a cadaver of a life to rot
And sew a macabre fate.

I will make it a distant nightmare
And wield it as it once commanded me,
Incarnating as an empire,
And so become immortal.

I can’t wait for someone to rise
From the ashes of dereliction to fix me,
So I’ll do it myself—as a soldier or a king—
And reclaim the royalty you tried to deprive me of.


Suspended Animation

World is a blur

I am a dying breed in this evolving industry;
For my failure to progress, to take a step forward,
I am sapped of my power, impuissant and futile,
Mewling in the climax of my death throes.

Insecurity confined me to the antediluvian;
I thrash, drowning beneath the waves of maturation.
This vessel I crafted to carry me across the seas
Has splintered and rotted, leaving me for dead.

Nascent emotions that never developed—
Stunted by the abuse of ostracization—
Cast me into a cyclone of indecision,
Rendering an unconditional state of inertia.

In consequence I watch you stoically,
Knowing you’re my escape, my progression
Into a world less asthmatic where I may thrive,
But in a blink you’re gone. I remain still.

A Collage of Horrid Fracture

It’s funny the lies people will believe
As long as it’s what they want to hear,
Like how you accepted I had a good time
When we both know I’m miserable inside.

It’s pathetic what humans settle for
When they’re desperate and lonely,
Like how I pursue what I know will destroy me,
And you submit to that from which you want to break free.

It’s depressing the games we play—
Of ignorance and spurning and glacial aloofness—
As though feigning indifference and heartlessness
Is a sensible use of our finite time on this rock.

The mass stupidity of what we’re trying to do
Can’t be laid on one person, so I’ll blame it on you
In my familiar fashion, eschewing accountability
Because I’m too afraid of facing my flaws.

If confliction is your defining quality,
We must be twins, or at least of the same mind;
That scares me more than torture of the worst kind
Because I don’t wish my faults on anyone.

Perhaps that’s the true reason why
I keep my distance from your radar;
Because you do care, and so do I,
But our affection is in discord, not harmony.